NOTE: This is part 3 of a 3 part series about finding your purpose in life. If you haven’t read the first 2 parts of the series you can view them here:
I suggest completing those steps first before moving on to this section since you will need them to get you to this point.
In part 1 we looked at 4 steps to guide you towards your purpose. In part 2 we looked at what is heavy in our lives and 3 steps on how to move away from these things and on to our hearts leading.
In part 3 we are going to look at putting it all together and moving forward into action towards our purpose.
So…you’ve done the steps to get clues to your purpose and you’ve identified heavy things in your life holding you back. Let’s move on to the good part!
Here is where the journey begins. Buckle up! This is where you step out of fear and into an incredible adventure of faith and trust in a heart guided path with no roadmap.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” -Mark Twain
When did life become so complicated? So many things on the “to do” list, careers that expect to be #1 in your life above all else. Most people wake up to a blast from an alarm scaring us out of our peaceful slumber followed by running around trying to get everything done and ready for the day, rushing out the door, sitting in traffic, spending the day in a stressful job that we probably don’t even like, followed by traffic on the way home, evening to do’s, and maybe just maybe we’ll get in bed early enough to get atleast 6 hours of sleep before we have to get up and do it all over again. Meanwhile during all of this we have technology going off in every form from emails, instant messages, social media, etc.
Now re-read that putting your own day into this format. How does it make you feel? Overwhelmed? Stressed out? Or like I did…that this is NOT how I want to live the rest of my life!
We are constantly moving on overdrive. We aren’t living. The days fly by in a blur. Is this what life is about? No, it’s wasn’t meant to be.
Our ancestors didn’t live this way. We have created this monster by constantly inventing things to be easier, faster, more convenient, so that we could get more done! But we’ve done nothing other than create chaos and a frantic lifestyle full of stress and misery. It’s easy to see the affect in how mean, rude, unfriendly, and self centered people are today. Look around you…we are miserable! And even worse we are spreading that misery into the world!
It’s time now to REALLY get in tune with yourself. We run around so crazy all day that we have no time to check in with ourselves, we are completely in our brains living in fight or flight mode. A state of constant chronic stress.
If you are reading this, you must be a person who wants more. Who wants something meaningful in your life. You don’t want to look back on your death bed saying “I wish I would have….”.
I have good news. It’s NEVER TOO LATE. It doesn’t matter how old you are, how much money you have, where you live, if you’re married, single, have kids…it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you are ready to change. You are ready to take action.
God is waiting for you. All you have to do is LET GO. Get rid of the limiting thoughts, the fears, the “what ifs” and the desire for what’s “safe”. Go inside yourself. Get out of your safety zone! Start praying for guidance and what steps to take. Get quiet and listen to your heart. Let it guide you. Get out of your brain, it’s in a constant state of survival and drowns out your heart.
“Life is a daring adventure or nothing.” – Helen Keller
The following are 3 steps to transition from your current life into your new life:
STEP 1: Awareness
I can’t express how important awareness is. This is the golden step to finding your path. It will be impossible to change your life if you are running around from one thing to another and living from your brain. You must become aware.
So, what do I mean by awareness? This is slowing down. Scheduling time to get in tune with yourself. It’s getting quiet and getting connected to your heart. It’s getting out of your head.
What does your heart want? What is it saying?
You may say “I don’t have time to get quiet”. My response is that you don’t have time not to! Understand that when you get quiet and when you give yourself that time, you will do everything else in life better. You will do it in a more heartful way. You will also start removing things that aren’t working and making a way for things that do serve you. It’s these things that will lead you on your path.
It’s also being aware of how things are affecting you and your reactions. Whenever you get that feeling of stress, of heaviness, of anger, of hurt, feeling offended by something someone said to you, or feeling unhappy…this is when we need to look inside and ask “why do I feel this way? What is bringing up this emotion?”
You will find most of the time it’s because of what you are focusing on and thinking about. If you are moody or stressed, take a look at what you’ve been thinking about. Are you meditating on bad things in your life?
Also, we all have triggers. Triggers are things that happen around us that take us back to something bad that has happened previously in our lives and in turn we react. We might become defensive, feel offended, put up our walls, or something could come out of us that we don’t even know where it came from! We have to be aware of these in order to change them and heal them. The goal is to not let what others do ruin your day.
You have to get to know yourself and you have to be aware of what is happening inside of you. Ask the questions of yourself because this leads you to healing and it helps you change destructive patterns. It can make you realize that a lot of your emotions are coming from one thing such as “they made me feel judged or unloved”. One thing you were missing inside of you as a child can trigger many different responses now.
This is a deliberate conscious action that you will need to take daily. It’s going to be really hard to slow down at first and you may be squirming the whole time when you try to get into a calm state because you are used to living in chaos. But trust me, it does get easier and it will become second nature if you keep working on it.
Most importantly…DO NOT GIVE UP! Talk to yourself in a positive way such as “This is hard but I CAN DO THIS if I don’t quit, the outcome is going to be amazing!”. Do not speak limiting thoughts to yourself like “I just don’t have time for this” or “I can’t do this, it’s not working for me”. If you think you can’t…then you won’t. You got this! If I did it you can too.
STEP 2: Be Patient
When we’re in a miserable place or feeling trapped and unhappy we want to change it right now. Please be patient with the process.
I will tell you that mine was an 8 year process and I have gone through some hard things. Each choice I made from my heart opened up a new realization and helped me learn who I am. It showed me what wasn’t working and what was holding me back. Then I was able to work towards changing those things.
Don’t be afraid to try new things! If it doesn’t work out there is always a lesson we learn from it. That is how we are changed, molded and prepared for our journey. I’m a completely different person than I was 8 years ago and I had a lot of things I needed to heal from. I can look back now at each challenge and say “thank you” because it shook me and it changed me in a big way.
When we try to force things too fast we are usually functioning from our brain and not our heart. Our heart isn’t frantic and anxious, it takes you through one step at a time. Make sure that what you want is coming from your heart and not your brain. If you are trying to force it or have any bad feelings about it, then don’t do it or wait until it’s a decision that feels peaceful.
I am the type of person who wants change NOW when I am in an uncomfortable spot. Don’t get me wrong, some people are in the financial position to walk away from their jobs, they have the skills to start a new business or venture immediately, or they can take off and travel for a year. If this is you…you’re lucky! This isn’t the case for most of us.
Be prepared to put in the work and take steps daily to move away from those things that are holding you back. Trust the journey. Each time you come to an obstacle, instead of asking “Why is this happening to me” ask yourself “What is this lesson trying to teach me?”. When you start looking at problems deeper and seek the lesson they bring, you will move through them much quicker. We all want to get through problems quickly right? I know I do!
Also, shift the way you think about those hard things you are trying to move away from. Instead of seeing them as chains holding you back, look at them as a bridge to where you are going. This was a huge shift for me that really helped in my journey. It turned those things into part of my journey instead of an evil creature stealing my life from me. These things that have been holding you back have actually been fuel to push you forward to your path.
Be patient with yourself. If you mess up, be kind to yourself. We all do it and it’s part of the journey. No judgement, no limitations, just you taking steps each day in the direction you want to go.
Don’t let anyone hold you back. Family and friends may not understand what you are doing. They can’t feel your heart, only you can so be careful about asking for opinions. Don’t let them tell you that you can’t do something. If they think you’re crazy…GREAT! Let them, because those will be the same people wanting to know how you did it once they see you at the end point. Prove them wrong! Surround yourself with people on the same path.
STEP 3: Action
If you want things to happen, you must take ACTION!
Taking time for yourself, healing, allowing yourself to feel emotions…this stuff is hard. But oh so worth it. This is how you move out of the misery you are in and on to what your life is meant to be.
This won’t happen overnight so give yourself grace, be kind and patient with yourself…it’s a process that doesn’t happen quickly for any of us. The goal is to keep moving forward one step at a time. Don’t think about how far you have to go, just keep moving forward on your path and recognize how far you have come.
Here are 6 action steps to get you going (you can create your own as well):
Schedule time each day for quiet time – Every morning I get up, feed the dogs, then I go sit in my quiet time spot. I do different things depending on how I feel but I’ll usually start with some deep long breaths, followed by quiet calmness with my eyes closed focused on feeling peace and letting all my problems go.
I have a couple Bible verses that I go over in my head when I’m feeling anxious or tense and they calm me. I also pray during this time. If there is anything heavy I’m carrying I pray about it. I pray for help to get through it, I pray for guidance and then I give it to God and I let it go…trusting him to guide me when needed. Then I’ll read a portion from a book on something positive. Sometimes I’ll journal as well. It just depends on the day.
Other ways are to get out in nature, away from people or things that will disrupt you. It can be a walk in a favorite area, it can be a room in your home with the door closed, it can be whatever makes you feel calm and peaceful. Just be sure to not think about your problems during this time. Instead just be in the moment, hear the sounds around you, feel the peace of having this time to yourself, breathe fresh air. Let your heart talk and turn off your brain.
Be in tune with your feelings – Throughout the day you should be taking a moment to investigate how you feel. If you are having a bad day, think about what you have been thinking about. When we think stressful negative thoughts, we are going to have a stressful, negative day. Worrying does nothing good for us and it changes nothing. Learn to let go and trust that you have the strength to deal with whatever comes your way WHEN it comes your way. Stop trying to deal with things that haven’t happened yet.
Do something you love EVERY day – This is very important so don’t skip it. Schedule time on your calendar for this. You want to identify the things that bring you joy, lower your stress, make you laugh, and make you happy. The things you love are clues to your path. The more you do them the quicker your life will shift and new doors will start opening because you are connecting more to YOU. This is the quickest way to shift your life.
“You make time for what is most important to you”
Don’t ever say you don’t have time to do things that you love. Not only will you benefit from that time, but everyone around you will get a better version of you. DO IT!
Surround yourself with positivity and inspiration – It’s important during this time that you seek out positive inspiring people and things to surround yourself with. People who are not in the same place as you will try to hold you back and they won’t understand or support what you are trying to do. Find people who live big, who inspire you, who make you want to be a better version of yourself.
“We become what we surround ourselves with.”
Read positive books, post inspirational quotes on your mirrors or wherever you will see them. Start your day reading positive messages.
Practice Gratitude – Thankfulness and gratitude are truly the key to happiness. Make it a point each day to look at all the blessings in your life, even the tiny things. Remember how incredibly blessed you are. Search for and seek out the good things in life and say thank you daily.
“Be thankful for what you have, be fearless for what you want”
Let go of fear and the lack of a roadmap – If you’re a planner like me this will be huge for you. If you live in fear and desire safety this will be huge for you. This is the scariest step for everyone!
God doesn’t give out roadmaps. What he does give is guidance from your heart and it’s up to you to follow and trust that guidance not knowing where it’s going to lead. One step at a time is all it takes.
For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. – 2 Timothy 1:7
As you take each step you will receive guidance to the next step. The more you do this, the more brave you will become. Your faith and trust will build and you will enjoy this magnificent journey with God.
I have taken some scary and dangerous leaps of faith in my life. I just jump when my heart says to jump. People tell me I’m crazy, they tell me it won’t work, they judge me, they abandon me…but I always have landed on my feet. God has ALWAYS taken care of me. A lot of times he’ll come through at the last minute when I think he left me stranded. Going through this builds our faith and teaches us to trust even when the ground feels unstable.
The cool part is that every leap you take, huge growth comes with it. You change, you find yourself, and all those people who doubted you…they see it all worked out and they wish they could be as brave as you.
Most importantly, your relationship with God becomes this powerful, awesome experience! There’s no explanation for walking hand in hand with the God of the Universe.
“Oh, the places you’ll go.” – Dr. Seuss
If you feel comfortable, I’d love to hear your journey. You can leave a comment on the blog comment thread, you can email me directly, or fill out my “contact me” form. Sharing your journey helps others and it connects you to others who are on the same journey. I’d love to be one of your biggest supporters!
Please share this series with anyone you feel could benefit. The more people following their hearts the more good we see in the world!
I pray your path leads you on the adventure of your life. I already know it will. Believe in yourself, believe in your heart’s guidance, and know that you can do ANYTHING.