How to Not Look Back on Your Life With Regret

I’ve been thinking a lot in the last year about what I want my life to be.   I think we all tend to fall into this pattern of “the norm” and think we are living.   But it’s so clear with how unhappy people are these days that this boring chaotic “normal” existence is not feeding our souls.  Can you relate?

 

First of all we are all different.   We all have different personalities.   One size doesn’t fit all. We were all made for something amazing.   But we are so busy being “normal” and trying to fit in that we get comfortable in the safety zone.

 

In the corporate world most people go home at the end of the day, many drink some kind of alcohol, and plop themselves in front of the TV.   Do you know that sitting is the new smoking?  

 

We sit all day long in front of a computer screen, working our butts off to make someone else money.  We are limited to how much money we can make and at the end of the day we are mentally drained and not just from our work, but because deep down we are not happy.  Many of us have chronic stress which also destroys your health and your energy.

 

So we go home, sit on the couch, and watch crap TV.  So we’re feeding our brains a bunch of crap! But we are so exhausted from the day that we just want to lay there lifeless.

 

WTH PEOPLE!!   When are we going to do something about this?  How about NOW.

 

Here are the top 5 regrets of the dying:

 

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

So many of us are doing what is expected of us.   Most parents want their kids to get high paying jobs, get married, and have children.  You know, “the norm”. They put very heavy pressure on their kids to do this and they base their own worth on what job title their children hold.  

 

My question is WHY THE HECK DOES IT MATTER WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS??   For me, I just want my son to live 100% from his heart and not chase money.   Money flows when you flow. I want him to chase his passions.

 

Having these expectations and allowing them is living your life in a prison.   You’ll never get to know yourself or experience amazing things in this world if you are going to spend your life worrying about what others think. 

  

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

My dad is a workaholic.  He wasted his whole life working 7 days a week 16 hours a day.   It was his identity. He thought that was what defined him.   

 

Then I come along…the odd duck in the family.   I’m adventurous and I love to take risks and move to new places.   No one in my family understands me so they gossip about me instead because I make them uncomfortable.   I can’t talk to them about anything because their responses are judgemental and fear based. I always walk away feeling misunderstood and unsupported. 

 

I spent my whole childhood trying to be like my dad in hopes that he would like me.   Now as an adult I try my hardest not to be like him. I don’t want to live in one place my whole life working myself to death.   I want to die with memories of all the incredible things I experienced. I want to die smiling from a life well lived. No regrets.

 

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people are too afraid to express themselves.   I mean their REAL TRUE SELVES. The majority of people wear a mask of who they want people to think they are.   We are scared to reveal the “real us”. It’s vulnerable.   

 

Whenever we feel different, we think we are weird instead of embracing that every one of us is DIFFERENT!   That is awesome! And truth be told…we are all weird!

 

You know what happens when you are your true authentic self?   Amazing things! And it gives others permission to be their authentic selves.   Don’t live a life hiding yourself. Be real, be raw, be authentic, be weird, and be YOU.   That is where you will find your true freedom.

 

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with friends/family.

This one has become an epidemic.   There are some perks to technology but there are many many bad results due to technology.   #1 is loss of connection. While we are connected on social media, we aren’t truly connected as people anymore.  

 

Technology also has us multi-tasking much more which leaves little time for real connection.  No one makes a phone call anymore but instead we just send a text. People are lonelier than ever in a world that is supposed to be more connected than ever.   Suicides and depression are at an all time high because truthfully, it feels like no one cares.

 

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

We are HARD on ourselves.  We don’t believe in ourselves.   We are in fear of daring to take the dream trip we want to take, to try something new, to risk putting ourselves out there to start our own business.  

 

YOU HAVE TO DO THE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU IF YOU WANT TO SEE INCREDIBLE RESULTS IN YOUR LIFE!!!   

 

It doesn’t matter if your friends or your family agree, it doesn’t matter if they tell you you’re crazy and that it will never work out (I’ve been there numerous times).  

 Your heart will tell you the truth.  Hear it and TRUST it. And GO DO THE THING!   The more you do things you love the more you will find yourself and the more doors will open.

 

Which of these 5 regrets stands out the most for you?   A couple of them? All of them? Do you have some you would add?

 

Where are you not living your best life and what are you going to do to change that RIGHT NOW?

 

Please don’t leave this world with a life of regret.   Take some time away to really think about this ONE life (that goes by really quick by the way) and think with your heart…not out of the fear of your head.  

 

What do you want to do?

 

Who do you want to be?

 

What will you NOT allow in your life anymore?

 

Ignore the limitations that will come up as you do this.   That is the fear in your brain speaking out. But I can tell you, if you take the action towards what you want, you will find that all those limitations your brain came up with were false.  

 

The world opens up to you and supports you when you follow your heart.

 

Much Love,

Denise

 

  1. At the end of her life, one of my mom’s biggest regrets she said was spending a lot of time worrying about things that didn’t really matter. Good stuff Denise!

    1. Thanks for sharing that Ralph. You witnessed those regrets first hand and I’m sure it changed your life. Worrying is probably my biggest one as well. I’ve spent most of my life worrying about EVERYTHING. It really affects your ability to just be happy and live in the moment. It makes you uptight, stressed, and it doesn’t allow you to be fully present in your relationships. But we all do it. They say something like 80-90% of what we worry about never happens. My goal is to get to where I can fully live in the moment, not thinking about what could happen, not thinking about the bad things from the past, but fully living just in the present. I’m getting there! Thanks so much for sharing! 🙂

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