Do you realize that a lot of things we do in our lives are based on what others think of us or what we want them to think of us? It’s amazing how people focused we are nowadays and we don’t even realize it.
Many years ago if you would have said I was living for others, I’d say no way, I don’t care what other people think at all! I’m not one to follow the crowd. However, when you start looking deep inside yourself and analyzing ways you react, triggers, or decisions you make, you may realize that a large percentage of those are based on other people.
We naturally want to fit in, to be a part of the tribe. And yes, we do need to all work together and take care of each other. But it becomes unhealthy when you are living to please others instead of making wise, life based decisions that give you a purposeful balanced life.
When your life is in balance you are able to become a happier person who’s more in tune with your true self and THAT is what you want people to see. That is what leaves a lasting impression and makes people drawn to you.
Instead most times we create an “image” of ourselves that isn’t the true us and this creates more of a divide between ourselves and others because we aren’t authentic. We tend to want people to think we are a certain way but when we do that we keep people at a distance in order to hide our true flaws. We’re unbalanced and out of alignment because we aren’t living our authentic truth.
“When you are content to simply be yourself, and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you.” – Lao Tzu
Sadly in today’s day there are MANY lonely people in the world. While technology was built to connect us, it’s actually creating a huge lack of personal face to face connection which we were all built for. Suicide rates are at an all time high.
With loneliness, people become more desperate for connection and they do things they wouldn’t typically do to get attention any way they can. This behavior may get you attention but it will be the wrong attention and it will only cause you more loneliness in the future.
Be ok with where you are now and start investing in your future and what you want it to look like. Focus on authentic true connections with people. Get yourself in a healthy state to where people are drawn to you because you are a solid person who isn’t needy or trying too hard.
“The greatest prison people can live in, is fear of what others think”
Are you wearing a mask? Most of us are. Imagine what it would feel like to be the true authentic you. Free to be quirky, different, weird, fun, comical, and original. Don’t you want to be an original? To stand out in the crowd instead of trying to be like everyone else? I do!
Being different and original is what inspires other people! Why? We are all drawn to authentic people who are living in their true selves because deep down we all desperately want that freedom to just be “us” and be loved for who we are. Being fake is exhausting!
“Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive that is you’er than you!” – Dr. Seuss
Today I challenge you to look deeper. Ask yourself the following questions and really think about it and write it down:
- What do I base my life decisions on? Do I base them on what I think other people want me to do or do I live by my passions and dreams?
- When I’m around other people, am I being my true authentic self or do I act a certain way to impress them? Do I wear a mask and try to create an appearance? Do I try to hide my true self and my vulnerabilities?
- When I’m in a relationship, do I try to be what the other person wants or do I show my true self, flaws and all?
- At work, do I act a certain way? Do I try to portray a certain image? Or do I get along with everyone and try to make work an enjoyable experience for everyone?
- Can I laugh at myself when I make mistakes?
- When I’m lonely will I go out of my way to get attention or do things that I really don’t want to do? Do I feel desperate?
Asking yourself these questions and really looking at your reactions to things and why you make the decisions you do will help you to see where your intention is coming from.
Going deep and analyzing your actions brings so much to light. It will help you understand your tendencies and to shift them to where you want them to be.
I hope you will take the challenge! I know that I prefer to be surrounded by people who are real. No walls, no masks, just quirky weirdness at its fullest! Being around these people allow me to be my true self as well.
Do us all a favor and BE YOU. 🙂
Much Love,
Denise
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